Reboot

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Reboot

Oh, You Know
My apologizes to those of you who have missed me.  Catching up on all that I have missed I noticed a couple references to my absence, so I feel it only fair that I explain myself.


Efforts with the lost prize proved fruitless and troublesome.  Ultimately she has realized she doesn't need me to be happy, instead having learned that the happiness I made her feel was a choice she had to make on her own to feel.  She is now happy with life and her "gloom demeanor" I was witnessing was simply her leeriness of being around me (as suspected).

I was opposed by a brick wall upon her coming clean to her best friend, who imposed his will on her and has since blocked all contact between my old prize and I.  The last contact I had with her, the best friend made his control over the situation known by answering her phone to tell me that she will never speak to me again and that I should never call back.  She personally confirmed it was me calling when I refused to give up my name, and her words were cut off rather abruptly as he took the phone from her and said his piece.  All attempts to contact her past that has not been responded to.


I do believe my attempt to reconnect gave me what I needed, just not what I wanted.  It gave me the understanding that there is nothing left to go back to and my potentially only shot at "being human" is gone.  That of course inspired a reboot of my entire being so that I can be entirely focused on my new (or old) goal of becoming all that I can be as what I am.  This change required plenty of alone time to rewire myself the way I wanted, so my presence here was an unwanted distraction.

I am proud to say that the reboot was successful, and all "connection" I felt toward her are gone.  I have come out of my "harem phase" (Phase 2 of the relationship cycle) and am now letting go of all the dead weight, having chosen my new primary and thus leading me back to Phase 1.


Progress with the new primary pets are as follows:
    K, the fellow socio whom held the better cards from the start, has ultimately lost our game of chess and is now completely subservient to my will.  She is my new dominance pet.
    D, an empath who has fallen victim to my charm, has been taken as my sole "girlfriend."  She has high rapport and is entirely hung up on me, believing I love her despite witnessing my most recent "harem phase" to some degree.  She is my new constant pet.

As I am in the single girlfriend phase, K remains solely for the control and sexual outlet while D will be the sole receiver of my attention and adoration.  K will be pampered only enough to keep her under my thumb, but that requires little to no maintenance as she is an end product now.

Other notable pets and assets are as follows:
    O, a back burner lover, has all the traits of a end product (no maintenance, cooperative) without the actual "control" over her.  She deems me a good friend despite my exploits of her, but keeps me around only because she secretly craves the helpless feeling I produce.  Like all listed in this section, I am no longer sexual with her but the window remains open if I should take the notion.
    A, the borderline whom I initiated the "Instant End Product" tactic on, remains unable to leave despite my complete disregard for her well being or happiness.  She still seeks recognition, signs that I plan to stop my mistreatment of her, and so on, so she is not quite "end product" yet as I had hoped.  She is, however, far more manageable than she was before the tactic was initiated, so I deem it a success.  I am currently in the "feigned attempts to change" stage of the socio relationship cycle, having promised not to know her again and respect her wish to be faithful to her husband.  These promises have all been made before, and she already knows I am lying, but has agreed to give me "one more chance" again, even after clearly stating she knows I wont and cant change.
    S, a former lover turned sister figure, has recently shown potential for a future financial asset and her persuasive personality is already openly at my disposal (her having clearly stated she will straighten out anyone who proves a complication for me).  She has high rapport and no upkeep and considers me like her brother, despite there still being a clear underlying "romantic" attraction.


All and all, I would say that I am recovering from the failure quite nicely and everything is going rather smoothly.  I am equally having success in reestablishing rapport with a familiar I despise who has proven useful in supplying my recreational habits.  He is an unwitting pawn in a much more sinister plot that I wont be sharing here at any time.


Enough about me, how has your week been?
My father said he knew I was a bit off ever since he took me to see Jaws as a kid, and I rooted for the shark.
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Re: Reboot

Fed Up
I don't feel so well, as I have had enough Vodka to fill a swimming pool.  But, I'm happy to see OYK.  I gotta talk to you tomorrow...

I read your first to paragraphs and will study them better when I wake up.  Sorry, things aren't quite perfect.   Enjoy the challenge.

Tomorrow is Christmas eve.  So much shopping to do.  I must be an asshole, too, to save everything to the last minute.  Seriously?  All year to plan for this day and NONE of my ducks are in a row.  PLUS, I feel ill from alcohol.

Anyway, first thing, tomorrow, when I wake up out of my haze, I will read all your stuff, and probably through a bird in the air (.!.) to someone on this board, since they all hate me.  People are so pissy and egotistical.

Here's to waking up in one piece...next to a sick bucket... I really don't feel good.  Hope that makes some of you haters feel better.  FEDUP might be sick, with her head in the toilet.

Oh wait in keeping up with my poor grammar standards: "Eye reely donut feild sow good write know."

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Re: Reboot

ALICE B
FedUp: Pay no mind to the grammar nazis and their antisemantics. It's a public forum, you can type whatever you want here. Don't get down because someone who you don't know who doesn't know you is correcting your posts. Your socio has done a number on your confidence if you are fretting about the obnoxious lfs on this site. You know that OYK and I value your presence here.:)


OYK-
'my potentially only shot at "being human" is gone.' I actually feel sad for a socio. ;) That statement almost made me tear up. I know for you the emotion is different, but that's a very moving statement!

I can't help but wonder if the gay bff had something to do with this. You said he was a socio, did he have some sort of competition going with you in a roundabout way? I don't know socio-socio dynamics.

I am jealous of your ability to "reboot". I wish I could do that. The harem thing makes sense because my ex has a list like that. Keeps them all around for different purposes. I just learned what a "constant" is. I was one of those.

Happy to hear from you. So grateful for your lessons here. I am regularly blown away by your observations and comparisons of socio-empath. Happy to be learning so much from you!

You don't have to answer this, I'm just curious. I picture you as a professor-type, mid 40's, light brown hair, snappy dresser and million dollar smile. I always have a way I expect people to look. Since this is an anonymous board, no need to confirm or deny details, but if you want to, I'd love to know!

I picture FedUp as a thin, petite brunette with medium length hair and glasses in her 30's or 40's, great posture, classy dresser. Anyone want to confirm or deny? I'm just having fun here. In case anyone cares, I'm female and blonde. I know, shocker. lol
Alice
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Re: Reboot

Oh, You Know
@Fed Up  Ignore those with nothing better to do than correct grammar in a public forum.  The only time you should worry about that is if you are posting in a forum dedicated to the English language.

I enjoy having you around, as does Alice, so rest at ease.  You are welcome.


@Alice  I'm glad you liked the statement. ;)

Yes, he almost definitely had a hand in it.  We have, as said in the big one thread, been quietly competing against each other as long as I have known of him (yes, before I even knew him).  We have always made subtle, under the radar attempts to separate the other from the prize.  Apparently 3 months without my presence was more than enough time for him to regain his control over her.  He made no effort to cover up his refusal to let us speak, having taken the phone from her before she finished her sentence.  It is a sad truth, but I have no place with her any longer.  Sad to you empaths anyway.  I see it simply as a failure that I must learn from.

Thanks.  I am happy to learn from you as well, and always glad to educate any willing to learn.


Ha!  Is that what you pictured?  Socio and "snappy dresser" rarely go hand in hand.  We are modest "simple" dressers.  I wear jeans and t-shirt every day, recently taking up wearing plaid shirts for the sake of warmth.  Half the age, that hair color, and a loveable smile in those rare instances that I can even make one without mirroring.  I have always been considered "wise beyond my years" so the professor idea makes sense.  I am frequently referred to as looking like a serial killer/pedophile/rapist, if that helps paint a picture.  What can I say?  I don't care much for "blending."  Naturally longer canines, pale skin, and charm that warms even equally cold hearts frequently inspires comparisons to a vampire as well.  Late teens and young adults have even asked, in seriousness, if I am a vampire.  I guess I just seem the type.
My father said he knew I was a bit off ever since he took me to see Jaws as a kid, and I rooted for the shark.
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Re: Reboot

ALICE B
Ok, after your description, I am picturing more of an  "absent minded professor" as opposed to plain old "professor". lol You are in your 20's? You seriously write like someone much older. Your insights are pretty unbelievable for being so young.

I know that socios are very observant and able to notice things that empaths oftentimes would rather not see. Having emotional attachment to outcomes makes us blind in some ways. There is much more clarity in viewing people in logical terms. There is no risk to you if someone reflects your "failures" to you. You don't take it personally, you just fix it.

I suspect that having the "competition" with the gay bff made the prize more valuable to you. I am now thinking that you vs him motivated you to pursue her. I don't think you are lying about the 'chance to be human' stuff, but competition (esp with another socio) seems to distort perspective for hfs.

Interesting- empaths can't see clearly if something is emotionally painful because it gets blocked. Socios allow competition to fuel their priorities and possibly artifically heighten the value of the prize. Did you want her or did you want to win? Maybe both? I know I could be wrong about this. Also I'm dying to know of your sinister plot. I have one of my own...not related to my love life though. ;)
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Re: Reboot

ALICE B
PS You are lucky vampires are "in style" right now. That makes you a chick magnet
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Re: Reboot

Oh, You Know
In reply to this post by ALICE B
Yes, I am really that young.  When I was barely old enough to see over the table I was sitting at it having intellectual debates and competing in games of wits, with the late 30s, early 40s friends my father had.  The trend just never ceased.


It is funny, although appropriate, that the one time a socio does something solely for sincere reasons everyone questions his motives and rationalizes a socio answer for it.  Amusingly, this very same thought process is what socio use when determining why an empath does something.  "There has to be an empath answer."  Would likely be on most socio's mind if an empath were to do something sociopathic.

Alas, no selfish need to "win," no addiction to the struggle between 2 sociopath.  I just earnestly wanted to be with her because she made me "happy."  And, I was rather missing that empath feeling of joy back then.  I stated in a previous thread that, before finding out what I was, it was my life goal to find true love.  Although it wasn't until after realizing I couldn't actually love someone, I believe what I had for the prize was as close to true love as I could experience.  I wanted her because I saw a future with her, because I wanted to be the source of her happiness.  Sometimes life is just that simple.


My sinister plot doesn't involve my love life either.  I am equally interested in what yours might be.  Mine would make your skin crawl. ;)



Yes, I know they are.  I have gotten quite a bit of attention simply by being the creepy guy.
My father said he knew I was a bit off ever since he took me to see Jaws as a kid, and I rooted for the shark.
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Re: Reboot

Fed Up
@Alice: I love your question!  I often wonder to whom I am speaking :)

I have a total blank slate for OYK and for you,  which bothers me.  Alice, I figure you are prettier than "the norm" and I am certain that you are more intelligent than the norm and strong (why else would you be questioning?).  You don't seem like a wilting babe in the woods, which I respect.  

OYK, I have NO clue, but your questions and his answers gave us some insight.

@OYK:  You confuse me.  You seem to have a genuine interest in your "Love Interest", but then, you loose patience with your target after ONLY ONE WEEK of effort. And hence, you proclaim "its over"...and then you are off to another target as if she didn't matter?  Or, I am reading this WRONG, please correct me!?

Like, at some point, you have to see were two and two, does not add up.  Is she "important/irreplaceable" OR NOT.  I just see some contradiction here.  At this point, IF (and really mean IF, cuz I cant tell if you really want her back), my best advice is to be PATIENT and CONSISTENT.  You high IQ socios, have the CHARM to get whatever you want.  However, you LACK the patience.  SO, BE PATIENT!!!!  Say what you mean and WAIT IT OUT!  Don't get pissed at her for not immediately responding.  Give her time to digest.

SUMMATION:
Consistency is key. LEARN PATIENCE.  Socios need INSTANT gratification.  DROP THAT need if you want this chick back. Move the chess piece forward to where you are a little "exposed" (I know this is uncomfortable for you untrusting socios!), but KEEP it there.  

Come back to me before you make your next move.  CHESS GAME, if you want to win, get back here and ask advice before you do anything. Alice too.  I'm pretty sure I can help.





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Re: Reboot

Oh, You Know
@Fed Up

Why did I give up so quick?  It is ironic that you mention playing chess, when that is precisely the problem.  The present situation appears workable if you neglect to see beyond the present.  She has had months to digest the situation and she remains unwilling to even speak to me.  She isn't angry at all anymore, she just doesn't want me around.  I could, probably quite easily, manipulate her into taking me back and/or destroy her relationship with her long time best friend for easy access to her.  But then I would have her back because I made her take me back, not because she really wanted to be back.  And the whole reason I asked for empaths help was because I am not willing to do my thing with her.
My father said he knew I was a bit off ever since he took me to see Jaws as a kid, and I rooted for the shark.